Chapter 1

Growing up as a child I was always a people pleaser. I probably inherited or adapted this trait for various reasons. So I believe this may have started my journey with difficult relationships, being as though the relationship with myself wasn’t the best,

I came to this conclusion when I became older. It took time to realize and value the relationship I had with myself. I’ve grown to learn that this is the most important one. Learning how to accept and love my flaws was key to myself love. However, I had to encounter quite a few peaks and valleys in order to enjoy the fruits of this necessary labor.

I experience my first love at the tender age of 14 , or this is what I thought was my first love. See I believe he was a little more exposed to real life challenges while I was being nurtured and cared for by my mom. Meaning he wasn’t as shelter as I was in my opinion therefore, I’m assuming he viewed life and maybe young love or love interest differently than me. All I wanted to do was laugh, joke and be free and I quickly started to notice that this seemed to annoy him. He also seemed to be very jealous and heavy while I was a little more lighthearted. He made me miserable, but I blamed myself. First Lesson: I was way too young to be engaging in any type of physical intimacy. I was a child (adolescent) and I still had the mind of a child therefore it should not have happened. See I view physical intimacy and physical connections as a gift now. This gift is special and, in my opinion, should be shared with a very special person as well. I think it takes maturity, self-love and the understanding of some of life’s principles before one should think about engaging in this beautiful act.